The second lady became a close friend as we are close in age and in personality. I would say we are soul mates and I wish we were partnered together. I did not realize how much I missed companionship with someone my age until we started to go on adventures and tell stories and laugh. One night we went shopping at the the market and then got the most delicious milkshakes and I felt normal for the first time in awhile. We shared our life stories, our struggles and our dreams. It was all quite wonderful. Some nights the three of us would gather in one room to watch a movie or discuss our days. I watched Braveheart for the first time with them! I loved every moment.
I also enjoyed the freedom I have here in the capital. I got in rickshaws by myself and walked to a store alone and shopped independently. It was as free as one can get in this oppressive culture. My new friends took me in and made me feel integral to their week. I went furniture shopping with Rose, the older one, for their new center and she valued my input. Besides Kathy and Shannon I do not feel valued in this country because of my gender, age and single status. Rosie gave me a feeling of importance just by asking what chairs I thought would be best. The people here never ask my opinion, excluding K and S. They ignore me or go through my guardians first.
Cutting the grass by hand.
Currently, I am stressed and angry because of these actions. Today I just wanted to go outside and read, but a group of men felt it was within their right to cat call, yell and annoy Kathy and me. Ignoring does not help, because they are men and there is nothing wrong with yelling at women because I am a lowly bideshi (foreigner) woman. I currently have a great dislike for the men in this country and want to punch something. Instead I retreated inside and exploded on Jesus who is helping me cope. I digress.
I went to lots of fun places while in the capital to eat and get dessert. Shannon gave me my budget in cash before we separated and I liked being able to pay for my own stuff knowing how much I was spending. Once again, it allowed me a sense of independence...sense a theme here? At one of the restaurants they popped in a Backstreet Boys CD and we listened to its entirety while eating.
Now down to business! I loved the center so much. The girls are precious and sweet and eager to learn. I learned about the hardships of insider/outsider dynamics and about the cultural stronghold of hingshaw (jealousy). Without airing out all my findings it made me so sad to see that the women who worked the center had no real friendship because they are so worried about one upping the other and other catty things.
I went to the center everyday that they were in session and stayed for different amounts of time. The center is open for the girls from 8-1:30 and then for women to learn vocational sewing from 3-5. Between those two times the staff eats lunch and has a Bible study. Let me tell you that Bangla food was the best I have ever had. My translator for the week cracked me up. She is 24 and quite flirty. She is a baby Christian full of personality. She made me laugh and encouraged me that women here can be on fire for the Lord. She also had the best clothes that she designed herself. When we get back home I am going to have a few outfits made for people and try my hand at clothing design.
My translator, Lilly, was vital to to the whole process. When we interviewed the teachers, manager, cook and children she helped set them at ease. The teachers were so nervous. They thought I was auditing them. I think they even scared some of the kids because I noticed that as I interviewed more girls the more nervous they got. Which did not make sense to me at first because my questions were not intrusive at all! However I learned that of the five little girls I talked to we have a future police investigator, a Jesus worker, a university teacher, a judge and a doctor. These girls lives will be forever changed because they had the opportunity to get an education.
Another interesting cultural experience this week happened when we had to go the hospital. Three weeks prior one of the little girls was playing in the street and a taxi bus ran over her foot. The driver, of course, kept going. The first day I was at the center Rosie asked if I could go to the hospital with her and her family because sometimes people get better treatment when they are with a bideshi. Sad but true. We get up there and they re-bandage her foot and talk options with her father. He started to get overwhelmed (I am not sure how much he understood) so he points to me and then points to the chair across from the "doctor." I am like "Whaaaa?" The father thought that I would be able to help understand. So Lilly and I sat down with the doctor to discuss the options. I am so thankful for Lilly because I had no idea what to do. I do not know the medical system here...I barely know it in America. We got a tentative plan which I proposed to Rosie who took care of the rest. Please pray for this girl. She needs a skin graft and the best hospital is far away from here. She will also need physical therapy which would be far away as well.
Many more things transpired that I will treasure in my heart and ponder for awhile, but I think you guys have a good taste. When I come home I would love to go into more detail about these past week so please ask! I am reunited with the family again and we are stuck in the capital for a few more days because of political things. Please pray for our safety and for the safety of the people.
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